


You Take My Calloused Heart and Make it Beat

by Unicornsfartglitter



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Bottom Daryl Dixon, Fluff, Low Self Esteem, M/M, Top Negan, janitor daryl, rich Negan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:03:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21885661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unicornsfartglitter/pseuds/Unicornsfartglitter
Summary: Negan buys a football team and decides to whip every single employee high and low into shape but Daryl Dixon is already perfect as is.
Relationships: Daryl Dixon/Negan
Comments: 10
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [NicLUVLiv](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NicLUVLiv/gifts).



> Here it is! Chapter 3 was a bitch to get done but anything for you my love!

Buying the Eagles was an easy option for Negan and one of the cheapest purchases of his life. Born from a rich family he refused to let that define him and instead broke records on the football field along with acing every exam that came his way. It’s how he chose to quit playing and graduated from Havard. His friend Dwight was always a rich poor sap, entitled and stupid and it was easy for him to manipulate him into selling him one of the best performing football teams at a steal. It was all child’s play for Negan, he would hire Rick Grimes to help manage his team and stop by when he felt like it or when the team slipped up on something and needed a reckoning, the rest of the time he would just rake in the dough.

It still meant traveling to the city of Chicago and making his demands known, yelling at the pros and letting him know what was expected. Not one to half ass anything Negan decided he would meet with everyone who made this team function from the grass cutters to vendors, everyone here would understand his expectations and would abide by his rules.

After a week full of screaming and waking up at the crack of dawn Negan had finally told the vendors what he expected and snapped at Rick a few more times to keep him on his toes. He was paying him a healthy salary after all, never mind it could be more. Negan sat down on a bench and looked at a poster of his star quarterback in an action stance, it made him roll his eyes and he looked down at a bleached white floor, waxed to perfection. It was something he noticed every day. Everything was immaculate down here no matter how hard he inspected, not one splotch of mold in the showers or speck of dust on the lockers. He groaned and rubbed his neck, next week he would be going back home to Virginia.

It took him too long to hear quiet footsteps coming closer and he whipped his head around to see a middle age man with eyes that looked broken. The man before him was beautiful Negan could tell, the Custodian then shyly looked down at his feet and approached Negan like a submissive dog. Negan cleared his throat and stood closer looming over the shrunken in man before him.

“So you’re the Janitor.”

‘Custodian.’ Daryl thought of replying but what did it really matter.

“Yes sir.” Daryl swallowed then tacked on. “It’s nice to finally meet you Mr. Negan.”

Negan would never be broke a day in his life, had more money and deals swarming every week than bees in a honeycomb but he never liked being called Negan. It reminded him of his overbearing and hardly working rich father.

“You can just call me Negan and you are?” Negan acted like he didn’t already know.

Daryl looked up and just as quickly back down and rasped out. “Daryl sir.”

His posture was all wrong and not because he was meeting one of the richest men of this region at the moment but because this Daryl looked like he had nothing going for him. Negan gave to charities but never to bums and nothing ever made his heart hurt except seeing an unlucky kid or mistreated lady and that couldn’t even make him stop faking a smile even if it upset him.

For the first time Negan frowned from concern and wanted to know someone who wasn’t introduced to him as some part of a business deal.

“Well how long you been working here Daryl?” Negan coughed, amazed at how soft his voice fell to ask such a question, one he wouldn’t usually care to know.

“Five years sir.”

Daryl always knew he was a dummy but when he found out Negan, a businessman who needed no last name published to be known he researched. He was smart enough to read and see the man’s astounding net worth and awards won. Negan was generous but a brute and nothing was beyond his reach it seemed. Dwight hated him, surely told this man who he was but he also realized Dwight was stupid. Negan had barked out orders to everyone high and low, each person who mentioned Negan let him know how cruel he was. He cussed them out and cut them off, demanded excellence and let it be known he hadn’t witnessed it yet. Daryl hardly made ends meet but he didn’t want to lose his job but it’s not what made him hunch in on himself and his heart beat out of the chest. That was just him being a Dixon and knowing he meant nothing to the world around him.

“Daryl.” Negan interrupted his thoughts.

He looked to Negan and saw he looked rather unhappy and that wasn’t a good sign, no shock the country hick warranted this reaction and he started to sweep the already clean floor for something to do.

“I heard you are talking to everyone, is it our time? If not I should keep on working.”

It didn’t look good to be lazy in front of the boss and he wasn’t sure if it was his time yet, Daryl was lowest on the totem pole here and though surely Negan would talk to him too he wasn’t sure why.

“You’re a hard worker.”

Daryl froze at the praise, not sure he heard correctly.

“I just do my job.” Daryl replied and kept sweeping.

“I inspected this locker room and every corner of this stadium before anyone knew I was here. There’s a lot to be done. Cold food, better coaching, parking lot spaces need to be repainted, maintenance work but there’s one area that’s perfect.”

Though the man mentioned coaching Daryl expected him to say the team.

“Yes sir, the Eagles don’t make it to playoffs every year but they do their best and exceed.”

Negan laughed and grabbed Daryl’s broom, his hand too close to Daryl’s as he took it. “Silly you, I meant the cleaning.”

Daryl waited for what everyone else said, Lisa the only other custodian to get the praise. Everyone believed because she was a woman and not a Dixon that she did a better job, despite their areas were different and he sometimes went behind her just because it irked him.

“I’ve been reading up on logs, anything I can get my hands on. I met with Lisa yesterday and I took a smoke outside before I went in and you know what I saw?”

Daryl wasn’t sure what that was but looked into Negan’s eyes for the first time, mocha eyes with just a bit of honey amber stared back at him from a man who was smirking.

“What would that be?” Daryl asked.

He bit on his nails in anticipation, waiting to be put down. He wanted that damn broom back so he could have something to fiddle with and looked down to Negan’s large hand wrapped around wood and gulped.

“I saw you sweeping up the entryway inside and outside.”

“Yes sir?” Daryl phrased it as a question, not sure why this mattered.

“Interesting thing was I read over duties and the entryway was Lisa’s area so was the women’s bathroom I saw you at this morning, cleaning a toilet with a damn toothbrush.”

Daryl coughed then, overwhelmed at Negan looming over him, he was staring too intently at him and it made him nervous.

“Yes sir?” He asked again, lost for words.

“You’re an overachiever.” Negan said.

He was intent on finding a mistake when he came into the locker room, this wasn’t where the conversation was supposed to be going even if it was true. But now looking at Daryl who was making every effort to appear smaller it was just so sad. He didn’t understand what the deal was but he felt sorry for the man and was starting to appreciate his hard work more just by seeing how clueless he was that this was a big deal. Most men didn’t try to go above and beyond and a custodian at that? It peaked his interest.

Daryl pulled the red rag out from his back pocket noticing that Negan was watching his every move. It made him unsure of his next steps, how to keep performing his job. Still he pulled out some disinfecting spray and squeezed the nozzle, wiping down the lockers and closing his eyes when he had to bend over to the bottom set of lockers. His knees and back protested like every other day but he suppressed his grunts when he had a witness.

Negan was still staring, his eyes boring into his back.

Negan’s palms were sweaty and he could feel his heart thump against his chest, it was a foreign feeling and he watched the Custodian clean each locker with care, doing a good job while being quick. Daryl needed a good hair wash and his clothing clung off him like he missed a few good meals, the jeans were worn and faded but Negan licked his lips and sat down. Placing his hands behind him he sprawled his legs out, crossing them again and observing.

Daryl tried to find something to say, talking was never his strong suit but the silence was stifling. He pulled at his collar and cursed when he dropped his rag.

“Damn” Daryl swallowed and leaned down.

Silent eyes raked over him and he turned to see Negan unabashedly checking him out, the man scooted back on the bench and bit on his lips, reminding Daryl of a porno he had seen plenty of times before.

“So tell me about yourself.”

It was something that was said in movies or amount new acquaintances but nobody had ever asked Daryl this question and what was there really to tell? Nothing unless he wanted to lie but he couldn’t be rude either. He turned to Negan and fiddled with the rag.

“I wish there was much to tell but there isn’t. This is it.” Daryl pointed to his cleaning cart as if it was all that defined him.

Negan shook his head and pat the bench, it scared Daryl but when Negan pat the bench again and moved to a less sultry position he sat down and gave a small smile. Negan turned to him expectantly and he gave a fake grin and exhaled.

“I’m from Georgia and I just started driving one day and ended up here. Worked at a few restaurants but it wasn’t for me so I applied here and got the job.”

“Maybe Dwight’s smarter than he looks.” Negan whistled.

Daryl shook his head before he realized it then looked down. Negan sided up next to him and squeezed his leg.

“Go to college?”

Laughing Daryl squeezed his eyes. ‘Do I look I could ever afford College?’

Negan rubbed a hand down his leg.

“No sir.” Daryl decided to answer.

“I think it’s time for a promotion. ”

Daryl flushed scarlet but just a quickly got angry, Negan was into him, he wasn’t sure why but he wasn’t this type of guy. It was insulting that he assumed Daryl would lie down and do whatever for a better paycheck.

“My job is just fine sir and the pay is good enough.”

Daryl Dixon didn’t lie often and the last words felt sour on his tongue, he was struggling to make ends meet.

Negan raised his hands in surrender, gave him a hairs gap of room and smiled like a wolf. “Hey big guy, it’s kind of nice your mind raced to the gutter but that’s not what I meant.”

“You’re smart.”

He wasn’t but Daryl breathed in.

“I’m thinking you should take notes for Rick.”

“Rick Grimes?” Rick had managed some of the biggest teams in the United States, he was educated and efficient, surely had his own staff and he huffed.

“Yes Rick Grimes.” Negan spoke smoothly. “He dropped it all for the salary I’m providing, most of his staff had to break off. He will need a note writer, you can read right? Write? Comprehend? Most importantly shorthand notes?”

Daryl wasn’t really sure he could though he was far from illiterate.

“I’m not sure sir.”

“Well I am and it’s Negan. Stop with the sir.”

“Yes sir.”

Negan starred daggers at him and he froze. “Sorry si…Negan.”

By this point Negan was already approaching the door but he turned around and walked a leisure stride to Daryl and tilted his head up.

“I’m sure you will do fine, now be a good boy and clock out. Tomorrow you help me post this job for a new Custodian.”

Daryl couldn’t speak as a warm hand swept across the right side of his face and by the time he had a reply the lights were turned off and he was standing there alone.


	2. Chapter 2

Daryl tapped on the steering wheel of his beat up keep and got out. He still needed a job no matter the boss. Yesterday felt like a dream but when he touched his cheek he felt the lingering touch of Negan’s hand upon him. The man was loaded, intelligent, and good looking. Daryl couldn’t fathom what the man wanted with him.

Someone whispered and he looked towards a decked out SUV and stumbled when Negan emerged from around it with two coffees in hand. He felt like jelly as Negan smiled and looked him up head to toe and as he took a step he gave a shy smile.

“Shit.” Daryl groaned and looked at the road beside him.

“Daryl!” Negan jogged over and helped lift him up.

Daryl wasn’t graceful but falling wasn’t something he had done in years and he shook his head as he turned towards Negan.

Negan’s hands checked his face and he gasped at small sting, his new boss rubbed his covered arms and sighed. “Good thing you wore a jacket for protection.”

The man giggled and Daryl pulled out of his grasp. “Shut up.”

He stood still, realizing his disrespectful mistake but Negan took a sip of his coffee and handed him the other cup. “Long day ahead of us Dixon.”

At the door Negan beat him to it and opened it for him.

“Daryl.” Negan started causing Daryl to stop in the door.

The taller man leaned down and whispered in his ears. “I don’t usually let someone sass me but when you do it I like it.”

Goosebumps traveled down Daryl’s neck, the tingle of Negan’s words lingering in his ears as he numbly followed Negan to a desk to start a hiring post.

One downside behind assisting Negan was not moving, when Daryl stood he popped his neck and shoulders and leaned down to rub at his stiff legs. Negan traced each movement and leaned back.

“I already made us reservations.”

Reservations sounded too fancy and Daryl followed Negan as he was led to that big SVU where they rode down a few streets, ending up on Charlotte Road which was high end retail and restaurants. Negan easily parallel parked making it look effortless and when he went to open the door the man tsk’d.

“Ah, ah, ah I got the door.”

Negan ran around to his side, jogging with joy and beamed as he opened the door and helped Daryl step out. It made him uncomfortable but he bit his lip. The small restaurant was one he only heard of called Amore and he wanted to run. This restaurant was too fancy, dim lighting and fine china, he could hear a few uttered words of French from waiters and candles lit at lunch time.

“Daryl breath, you know me by now.”

The reassurance wasn’t really that but with no choice he listened. Negan whistled of all things and a waitress smiled at the pair.

“Follow me.”

The relief of English words was temporarily as he stepped inside a small room and turned around, there was only one round table and the waitress left after closing the door.

“I told you I know you.” Negan reminded him and pulled out a chair.

It was meant for him and though he felt like a lady he sat in it and was scooted up to the table.

“The food here is amazing but it’s no good if you’re worried about pesky manners.” Negan purred.

The ease of the moment was replaced by more worry because Negan barely knew him but was doing everything right. Daryl wished things could be this easy but they couldn’t. It was as if he was a pawn in a game, the moves forced by someone else and he breathed in deeper.

“Maybe we should have stuck to burgers at the office and a heart to heart.”

When he opened his eyes Negan was closer to him and he left only to pull up a chair right beside him.

“Tell me what worries you.”

‘I’m nothing, you will get bored of me, I can’t do this…’ Words jumbled in his head. ‘You’re worthless, no one can love you, you’re just so stupid, no one can take care of you like me brother so don’t’ trust anyone else.’ Voices of his dad and once alive Merle pounded on his head and he looked down at his lap, sunk dirty nails into his skin.

“Daryl.” Negan whispered but it was loud enough.

Daryl wanted to speak and yet he didn’t, it confused him because this wouldn’t last so why not speak up? Negan would leave either way but being honest now would be like pulling off a band aid and he closed his eyes again.

“I’m nothing.” Daryl whispered.

He waited for more words. ‘I know, I was waiting to hear that, you are nothing.’

Instead he heard a deep exhale and flinched at a hand gripping his.

“Who told you that Daryl? How many times was it said until you believed it was true?”

The room turned chilly, at least for Daryl and he shuddered but wouldn’t look up. Negan squeezed his hand and sighed.

“Repetition Daryl, tell someone a lie long enough and it becomes their truth.”

Daryl looked up into big brown eyes, they showed hurt that didn’t belong to the owner.

“It’s called verbal abuse and I’m sure you got more than that so listen to me today and tomorrow, so one day you will learn the truth instead. You are beautiful.”

The words only stunned him as he sat still. One more squeeze and Negan stood over him and repeated it. “You are beautiful.”

It was a haze as Negan ordered in English and they ate too much, pasta and escargot which was actually quite tasty, braised asparagus, and puff pastries. Though it was difficult Daryl let Negan hold his hand as they walked out.

At work they kept on, Negan reassuring him his computer skills were on point and that he was smart enough. For some it might be an insult but for Daryl to hear he was okay was easier than exceptional for it would have wounded him instead.

At the end of the night Negan followed him out to his car and pushed into him, a warm hand pet against him just like the night before and he gasped at a simple peck to his cheek.

Negan pulled away though it appeared to take effort and winked, it made Daryl weak even if he didn’t want it to. He walked to his own car but once there Negan whistled.

When Daryl turned he smirked, dusk making him hard to see.

“Good night Daryl and remember you…are…beautiful…”

With that Negan was gone and he got in his car and looked in the mirror, he was smiling and even when he tried to quit he could not.


	3. Chapter 3

Negan was supposed to leave two weeks ago but he couldn't. Daryl was too cute, insecure despite his triangle shaped body and toned arms. He was shy, bit his lips and mumbled in front of Negan, blushed at every comment. As always Negan was right, not only was he down to earth with shit self confidence but he was smart. He worked well with Rick but still had plenty of time to compile reports, arrange data in a way Negan had never seen before. The man joked more than once about dragging Dark to Virginia to his home office to work on things there, Daryl would look at his feet and give a shy smile never knowing Negan was serious.

Negan dreaded it but it was time to go home, His office in Senoia wasn’t running smotthly with incompetent Simon barking out orders, more him trying to look big and bad then handling things right. Virginia was home and Daryl was just a guy he knew two weeks. Tonight he would tell Daryl he was going home.

Everyone had left the office, the players done with training, Negan’s voice raw from yelling at the new custodian that wasn’t half as good as Daryl. The man sat beside him running data and punching it in a laptop that was beat up, Rick took the good one and even though it ran slow and Daryl tapped hard at the keyboard he never once complained. Negan imagined the job was taking three times as long as Daryl backspaced and tapped harder never rolling his eyes or cursing. He was beautiful, he eyes a sliver of blue as he scrunched his eyes and kept working.

“I’m tired.” Negan groaned.

Daryl didn't look up, typing in a few more numbers slowly before looking his way and smiling.

“Come home with me.” Negan whispers.

It wasn’t a real home but Daryl followed him out, putting up no fuss as Negan herded him to his SUV while his stayed Jeep sat there, a snowy white from the cold. Negan cranked up and pulled Daryl’s hand onto is lap. Two weeks ago there was a flinch, hesitant eyes stared at him as if he was a shark that could bite his hand off but now he settled down in the seat and closed his eyes.

“You don’t even know it do you?”

“Hmm?” Daryl rapsed.

“That your so damn beautiful angels cold weep.”

Daryl laughed like it was a funny joke but stopped at Negan’s hard stare.

“I can’t be the only one whose told you this.”

Negan had told him this many times, that someone else had to tell him he was beautiful. Daryl never heard any kind words from another and he pulled his hand away to bite at it. Negan pulled it from his lips and smiled sadly.

“Don’t feel bad for me.” Daryl hunched in his shoulders, ready to get defensive.

“I don’t feel bad for you Daryl, I’m damn lucky everyone in Chicago is obviously dumb.”

Daryl smiled uneasily as Negan pulled out, relieved the snow melted on the window so they could drive off.

Daryl got out and walked towards his condo, a familiar place between drinks and heavy petting, long nights of work. Negan unlocked the door and turned on the lights. While Daryl made himself comfortable he pulled out two glasses and filled them with bourbon.

Daryl swallowed it down like water and Negan followed suit, with both glasses empty he pulled Daryl in and kissed him, slipping his hands into his pants as he licked and bit at his neck. Daryl let himself be pinned down and grinded against Negan, groaning at the friction. Negan was so hard and didn’t stop kissing until he pulled off his shirt. 

Dary had only had sex once and it was a drunk fuck, Negan was a pro, pulling off his own pants withought standing. Daryl groned at heavy pets and stared at Negan stripping him. He shuddered when Negan pulled off his shirt. Looking at the ceiling, his heart beat against his chest, hard pumps as he breathed in deeper.

“Daryl it’s okay, breath.” Negan kissed him.

Gentle fingers traced up an ugly scar, touching marked flesh like it was fragile. Negan rubbed at his hips, giving unscared flesh the same amount of praise as he kissed Daryl again.

Negan pressed against his chest as he pulled lube out of a drawer and popped the cap. “Ever done this?”

Not sure what Negan was exactly asking he mumbled. “Had sex once a long time ago, played around back there a lot.”

Mocha eyes darkened with lust, he knew Negan was imagining the image of Daryl working himself open. When lubed fingers started to approach him Daryl spread his legs and relaxed.

“Damn you're right, not tight at all.” Negan winked.

“Shut up!” Daryl barked out, questing when two fingers prodded.

Negan took time widening him out, fingers speeding up and slowing down, three fingers thrusting with no rush to split him open further. Lube was added and Daryl panted, his prostate teased before fingertips traced at his rim. He groaned and pushed forward,

“Greedy huh?” Negan teased and moved his fingers away to kiss Daryl’s plump lips.

Daryl kissed back, groaning when Negan’s tongue assaulted his mouth, swiping each corner. Fingers breached him again, his precum leaking out steadily at four fingers inside him.

“I think you can take me just fine.”

Daryl swallowed, he got off on the idea of gaping more than the feel of a toy. Negan was thick and large and he wanted him bad.

“I can.” He whispered.

Negan lubed up his dick and lined up, his tip sinking in slowly. Daryl wrapped his legs around Negan sighing when Negan pushed in completely and slowly moved back and forth.

“More Negan.”

At the request Negan pumped in, taking him harshly. Daryl blushed at his walls squelching loudly but Negan kissed him, a thick dick glazed his prostate causing him to cry out.

“Loud too, love it.” Negan cooed.

Negan squeezed Daryl’s throat and pounded in, working up a steady rhythm that Daryl met. His hands slipped across Daryl’s sweaty torso and he tried to ignore the scars and the anger that came with it. Someone had hurt Daryl for a long time and yet the man was still gentle and kind.

Negan who loved nothing and no one felt a warmth in his chest that he couldn't decipher.

Daryl’s nails ranked across is back, scratching him up so he picked up the pace and fucked in harder. Cupping Daryl’s length he smeared him in lube and slowly jerked him off while he fucked him harder. 

Daryl cried out when he rammed across his prostate in steady thrusts. Negan’s hands were painted white, looking at Daryl he moaned out, flooding him with his seed.

“Hot damn.” Negan laughed out collapsing on a tired Daryl.

“Yeah” Daryl laughed back.

They sat there awhile, Negan still embedded deep inside. When he pulled out both were disappointed but smiled. 

“We sleep.” Negan suggested.

The couch was small but Daryl wrapped his legs around Negan once more and closed his eyes, his steady heartbeat lulling Negan to sleep as well.

When Negan woke up he was sore, cramped from staying on a small sofa. He was cranky and went to swear but when he opened his eyes he saw something that made him swallow, his eyes misted with unshed tears. Daryl’s back was a mess, marred skin that was thick and ugly, red and white welts crossing across it. Tan skin was barely seen in a sea of abuse and Negan clenched his eyes shut, if this man, woman was alive that did all this it wouldn't be for long.

Daryl stirred so he closed his eyes, giving Daryl time to be comfortable. Daryl stretched out as much as he could instantly knowing where he was. Turning to Negan he was relived he was asleep and he jumped up and put a shirt on first then finished dressing.

He was a shit cook but Daryl went to the kitchen and started to stir eggs with a fork and heat up a pan for bacon before turning on the coffee machine.

“Making yourself at home huh?” Negan walked in and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

“It’s not your home but yeah.”

They ate in silence but it was pleasant, with Daryl Negan found he didn't always have to have words that usually had to spew out. After breakfast they washed the dishes together, their hips bumping each other occasionally, it was domestic as shit amd Negan wanted more but that wasn’t him.

‘My jeeps at work, I need a lift.”

Negan nodded. “Need to shower first?”

Grimacing Daryl nodded no, Negan didn't need to see his back, his front was bad enough.

“Okay well I do, We leave in 15 but the boss doesn't care.” Negan’s teases.

Daryl smiled and watched a nice ass walk away. 

Daryl looked at the paining and knicknacks of a too expensive condo and he gave a small smile as his boss entered the room that quickly became a frown, Negan was twiddling his keys but he didn’t look too happy.

“It’s umm Tuesday and I need to fly out tomorrow.”

“Is there an emergency?” Daryl asked concerned.

“No.” Negan cleared his throat. “It’s just home.”

Nodding Daryl looked at his feet.

“I was supposed to leave two weeks ago.” Negan added.

“Yeah.” Daryl spoke, his throat cracking.

“I like this, being with you. You’re smart and a great addition to the team.”

The words were like a belt to his back, hurting him with a pain he hadn’t felt in years. Team? He was a part of the team and nothing else.

“Well I guess I’m not that smart.” He half joked.

“Daryl.”

“No, I get it.”

Storming out Daryl's mind raced. ‘Of course he’s leaving, he got laid. You put out and you thought he could like you? If he saw your back…’ Daryl blinked away tears. 

‘Nasty, whore, nobody could love you, you’re stupid.’ He yanked on his hair, happy with the temporarily relief and put his hands down when the door opened.

Negan pouted and walked over and though he wanted to run Daryl walked to the passenger door. Awkward silence they never shared before overtook the SUV as Negan drove into the city, 

“You think I’m an asshole and I deserve that but I wasn't’ using you Daryl. I’m not happy I have to go back but I do. I have a house, my biggest business there and you have a life here. I’ve never did the long distance thing but maybe when I come back in March if we still click we can discuss trying it out.”

It was January, Daryl wasn’t even worth a visit next month he guessed and he swallowed past a lump and coughed around it. He wouldn't cry, life had disappointed him over and over and the last time he let the pain of emotions get to him was too long ago.

“Don’t bother.” Daryl spoke out.

‘I’m not worth it.’ He tacked on in his head.

“It’s okay, I get it.” Daryl added.

He wasn’t worth it, Negan would find himself a City girl and have some babies, probably be a cheater but it wasn’t Daryl's problem anymore. It was better that way because Daryl had enough problems just trying to exist in this world.

‘I do love you. It’s not what I want. I don't want to hurt you.’ Negan wanted to say all these things but he didn’t.

He was an asshole, Daryl deserved better than him. Besides, Negan wasn’t relationship material anyway and this man deserved more.

Daryl worked all day beside Negan, kept it professional but that wasn’t shocking. At the end of his deemed shift he didn’t’ stay overtime nor say goodbye to Negan.

Negan walked back in with a coffee and saw Daryl's bag was gone, collapsing in a chair he exhaled shakily convincing himself this was okay and how things should be.  
\----  
The phone ringing woke Negan up, he was hungover and his heard throbbed at the shrill call. 

“Fucking hello?” He screamed.

“Hey Negan, it’s Rick. Daryl called in and I’m not sure where he put the jump drive we were working with.”

“He called in?” Negan looked at his watch that stared back with 10 am.

“Yeah, he seemed kind of upset. He’s a nice guy and keeps to himself so I don’t think it will become a problem.”

Negan walked to the fridge and opened it, chugging on a bottle of water. “Look on my desk and if it’s not there oh well. Do not fucking call Daryl about this.”

Before Rick could say okay Negan hug up. 

Daryl called out so he could avoid him on the last day. Typical.  
———————————————————————-  
Virginia was a different kind of cold than Chicago. It was crisp and clean, cold but not breathtakingly so. Negan walked down a street trying to enjoy the sights but after a month and no returned calls from Daryl all he could see was the two inches in front of him and he hates this life.

Daryl let him in and he stabbed him in the heart, when he closed his eyes he saw Daryl's scars, his frowns towards Negan that last day. The hurt that welled up in prideful eyes. Negan shit on him and for the first time in a long time Negan admitted something was his fault.  
————————————————————————  
Rick complimented Daryl on all his work, said his reports had an essence he had never seen before. Daryl couldn't figure it out but the paychecks were great. He decided it was enough to finally start buying parts for the bike he dreamed of restoring. His dead brother would be proud.

He tried to say it was enough, having money in his wallet and a successful job. A fan of the team saw him at the store and asked where he was working since he didn't see him outside anymore and the man was in awe when he told him of his new job, called him lucky. Ramen noodle meals and an empty home didn’t feel lucky. Damn, he needed a dog and a life but nothing like that came to a Dixon.  
————————————————————————  
Two more weeks passed and the team won, people in town started to know Daryl by name and it was weird, Daryl fake smiled and tried to be happy, fake it like he always did but ironically being a custodian made him happier than this, before Negan everything was easier.

“Daryl.” Rick ran up to him.

“Yeah?” 

Rick rubbed his forehead. “You got to go outside, there’s a package for you.”

Daryl quirked an eyebrow but stepped out, growing at no mailman nor fedex worker seen from afar. Walking towards the door he walked through it and stopped at a silver wrapped box. Maybe it was a bomb but frankly Daryl was over it so he opened the wrapped lid and gasped. A yellow lab puppy with a red bow around its neck barked and licked his cheek.

“Hey.,,” Daryl lifted it up. “Boy, who do you belong to?”

The dog seemed to smile and licked at him again and that’s when he noticed a card hanging from its neck. Pulling it off he read it. “Look to your left.’

Daryl turned and saw Negan, he smiled a second before deflating. Negan walked over quickly and handed him another card that he read.

‘Daryl I’m sorry I hurt you and I can’t take that back. Rick told me you wanted a puppy so he’s yours if you want him, no strings attached. I treated you like shit when I should have treated you like a friend, more but this dog will never let you down and will always be that friend. He’s not an idiot like me but aren't all animals smarter than us? You don't owe me a second chance but if you do I will work every day to have deserved it. I’m lonely Daryl, I miss you and my heart breaks not because I don't’ have you but because I hurt you. Please forgive me even if I can’t be with you but if you can give me more I will work on not being such a prick. I think it will be easier than we think because I love you Daryl.’

Daryl blinked and looked up at Negan.

“I don’t deserve this Daryl but I miss you, miss us. Please forgive me.’

It wasn’t a hard decision Daryl thought. “Yeah Negan I forgive you and we can try the long distance ting but hurt me again and I’m done.”

No words could be a vow Daryl would believe so Negan lifted him up and kissed him while making a promise to himself, to never hurt Daryl like this again.  
————————————————————————  
Negan shivered and looked up at the snow falling, the city was too cold and he could smell the pollution. The abusing wind chopping off the water made it feel colder and he shuddered, pulling his hood over his head.

“Come on Ralph, piss already you damn mutt! It’s too fucking cold out here!”

“Negan! Don’t yell at my dog!”

“Our dog Daryl and no one in Chicago should have a dog, who wants to go out in the snow for potty breaks? His paws have to be frozen just like my nuts.”

“Shut up Negan! There’s children here.” Daryl pointed a kid in the park to emphasize his point.

“Yeah, yeah and because I love your ass I walk Ralph ninety percent of the time and they love this mouth because they know it so well.” Negan grinned.

“Well.” Daryl yanked the leash away and grabbed Negan’s chin to kiss him properly. Negan grained, enjoying Daryl taking the lead which was rare. They kissed until Daryl pulled away for air. He screamed at a hard, unexpected smack to his ass.

“They're not the only one who loves your mouth Negan.” Daryl finished his sentence with smirk.

Negan smiled and shook his head at a playful Daryl, it took months to see this side but he had to earn it. Putting his hands in his pocket his fingers checked on a black box holding a simple silver band. 

Moving to Chicago was the best choice he made. Ralph had been Daryl’s friend for almost a year now and Negan figured he was due for another gift, one that promised Daryl the life he really deserved.


End file.
